6 Ways to Learn to Dream (as a Grown-Up) - When I Grow Up

6 Ways to Learn to Dream (as a Grown-Up) - When I Grow Up Broadway star. Paleontologist. President. The person inside the traffic light who makes the colors change. Debbie Gibson. A horse. A “boss”. What do these things have in common? They’re the answers I gave to the “what do you want to be when you grow up?” question when I was little, plus some of the answers I’ve heard from my Grown Up Gigs guests. (I think “traffic light person” is my favorite.) When we’re kids, our dreams are plentiful, big, and not based in reality. We’re encouraged to reach for the stars and are told we can do anything we set out minds to. Because of that, we feel safe to share our dreams, whether it’s warning a grown-up that a monster is behind them or asking another kid to play “teenager”. But when we become those teenagers, we’re bogged down with preparing ourselves for The Future. That’s when we’re told to Be Realistic and Do Your Homework Or You Won’t Get Into a Good College. We’re asked to peer into our crystal balls and figure out at around 17 years old what we want to do for the rest of our lives. Life gets heavy and we have to start leading with seriousness. There’s no time to play, and even if there was, we’d just look silly anyway. Now that I’m 37, I want to pump my fist in the air and lead the Look Silly Revolution. I think I qualify, as I’ve worked full-time as The When I Grow Up Coach for 5 years and counting, of all silly things! I’ve offered dream career guidance for creative women since 2008, and the importance of dreaming as a grown-up has shown up over and over and over again. Without dreaming, we become the hats we wear: Mom. Project Manager. Wife. Carpool Driver. Without dreaming, we become robotic, only doing the things others tell us to and feeling diminished and unfulfilled. Without dreaming, we can’t discover our interests. We can’t set our goals. We can’t define who we are and what we want to do in this world. Without dreaming, we give up control of our own lives and hand the steering wheel over willingly. Whether you’re 18 or 88, here’s how you can start dreaming as a grown-up: Be unproductive. As grown-ups, we tend to brush off the things we see as unproductive. If we don’t know the outcome of something, why start? In order to start dreaming, you have to be okay with taking time to do something that won’t have an immediate or clear result. Get quiet. Dreaming is not meditating, but to start the practice it needs to feel close to it. Be in a quiet room where you can close your eyes unselfconsciously, listen to your breath for a moment, and ask yourself what would be fun to envision in your minds eye. Try not to lead the images just see what comes up! Keep a DayDream Journal. You might’ve heard of a dream journal, where you jot down what comes to you when you’re sleeping. Keeping a DayDream Journal can be just as helpful! Share the images that come to you during dream time, or draw them if you’re an artist. After a few entries, you’ll see if they have any common threads, or what might be pulling you to start taking action on. Notice where your mind wanders. As you’re going about your normal every day life, you’ll find yourself thinking of seemingly random, odd things like learning to play the ukulele or an idea for a science fiction book. Keep those thoughts in your DayDream journal, with the caveat that you don’t have to take action on any of it! It’s just another way to see what your gut and heart is pointing you to. Try this visualization. Close your eyes and see everything that you’re frustrated with in the moment be stuffed into a balloon and released into the sky. Then see the sky envelop you, giving you the promise that you can do anything with the magic of stardust and sunshine. Withhold judgment as you see what that magic gives you, and what you wish for yourself when it comes to your family, your career, and your lifestyle. Be kind to yourself. It might have been months, years, or even decades since youve last dreamed, so be nice to yourself if you’re having trouble getting the dream machine started. If you know thats you, put a reminder on your phone every day this week to alert you to dream for just 5 minutes at a time. I’ve long held the belief that the key to living a passion-filled, fulfilling career is to follow your lifestyle goals. If you don’t know what they could be, then allow yourself the time, space, and permission to Look Silly and Dream. You’ll find out first-hand how productive it is to your grown-up happiness! If ya want help relating dreaming to your career change, you can watch the rebroadcast of Create Your Dream Career on CreativeLive starting 10/31 at 9am Pacific, and/or sign up for my free, live webinar happening 11/6!